Sinking

[joung]

Trying to keep head above water. Not succeeding. Brain ready to explode and melt into fog in mind. Unable to give or receive. cannot deal with in-laws any more. cannot deal with controlling people any more. cannot deal with self any more. feel like failure. feel like defective goods. cannot conceive. no one to share with. mess. maybe want life to be too easy. maybe too demanding. maybe don't deserve what i do have. hate myself.

[woong]

I am sorry to hear you are struggling right now.
Your username makes me wonder if it might be time to see a counselor again and be on meds again??
I don't know your story but I know that sometimes people, including myself, stop taking their meds too soon and end up crashing and burning big time. Needless to say I am back on meds now

Hope you will feel better soon and please keep us posted

[moon]

When I struggle, like you are, a hot shower, and a zen like focus on the thought that tomorrow can be better than today, helps keep me going.

It's analogous to a football player, running with the ball, being tackled by defensive backs, who are clinging to and piling on the running back - you have to keep moving your legs, as painful as it may be.

You may just be able to break free.