Feeling Of "doom"

[chaekyu]

This is something a lot of people don't seem to quite understand, although I do my best to explain it to them, maybe its because I haven't been able to justify it with words.

Sometimes, in the morning, at night, or randomly throughout the day, I'll hit a "wall". This Wall is not an actual wall you see, an emotional wall that prevents me from wanting to continue the day. This wall as I try to explain is a feeling of "doom", where it feels like if I take one more step, or get out of bed, or fall asleep, something horrible is going to happen. I'm not sure what it is all the time, but I feel SO certain of it.

Whenever I’m hit with this, I like to call it the "onset of doom", it feels like the weight of the world is suddenly on me. and attempting to go forward and continue with my life will only result in more misfortune and pain. What bothers me is the disturbing accuracy of these feelings, like I’m subconsciously predicting the future.

I can't help but want to hide every time I get these feelings, sometimes I almost panic saying something bad going to happen!" and I almost lose my head. I want to hide and not come out. Sometimes I won't sleep, I won't sleep because I know I’ll eventually have to wake up and it’s when I wake up that I’m more likely to feel the "onset of doom".

Sometimes, of course I’ll panic when the doom sets on me, and I can get over the panic, but the doom is still there.

Is it cowardly, to hide from the dangers of living, with no evidence that bad things are going to happen?

[hahninsik]

Ok totally off topic question, do you speak Spanish? Im just curious!

All rightly, now on to your topic, I can certainly relate that feeling, I have that feeling too sometimes, it’s like a wall, exactly like you say. Sometimes I feel that way too and like threes no point in stuff because its not going to matter anyway and so on.
I know this isn’t much of advice, but I mainly just wanted to tell you that I can relate and understand, and also that NO its not cowardly to hide from it, its a natural reaction to hide from what we fear or what we think of as bad or wrong, even the things that we cant really see, such as these feelings. Also, I understand about your jealousy, I have that same problem!

I would like to clarify re the jealousy that it isn’t about wanting the thing that other people have, say, I want that car, or those kids, or that house, its rather, I want something SIMILAR to what those people have, or to feel similar to what those people feel, not the same feeling as them, but ones own feeling or thing which is similar to what others have. Its not wrong to feel this either, the time when this gets wrong is when we become so attached to what others have and do that we forget what we have and what we can do!

[franti]

I know exactly what you mean. I often feel like something terrible is going to happen. I call it the "gloom and doom" feeling. I've asked - make that begged - my husband to stay home from work more times than I can count, simply because I'm terrified that something will happen to him if he leaves the house.

I spent 2 years hiding within my own 4 walls. On the rare occasions (doc appts and family holidays) that I did leave the house, I was in constant fear that something (I don't know what exactly) would happen.

After years of therapy, I can now leave the house - on most days. I still feel anxious many mornings, but I manage to talk myself through the panic, and get on with my day.

This "gloom and doom" is a horrible feeling. I'm sorry you're experiencing it. Hang in there, though. It does get better.